A disaster has occurred and you are forced to travel somewhere by airplane. Perhaps if you were very wealthy, you could charter a private flight. But otherwise, you have to ride a commercial airline flight, forcing you to go through the torments of airport staff and fellow travellers, all of whom are committed to making it the experience as unpleasant as possible.
Glove and Boots gives you practical tips and points of etiquette that you need to know. Your fellow passengers--especially those seated right next to you--must learn about the etiquette in particular. So in the highly unusual event that the in-flight WiFi is actually working, show them this video.
-via Laughing Squid
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I remember *flying* being a fun adventure when I was a kid, too. Not anymore... Then again, back then security wasn't so overbearing, meals, drinks, and snacks were always included, and flights almost always had plenty of empty seats. Plus they kept shrinking leg-room even while I was getting tall, sort of a double-whammy, so I'm not sure how much is nostalgia versus a very different airline industry.
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I went on a train ride once while I was a child. It was an overnight from (I think) Hamburg to Munich. It was a fun adventure.
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Look into going by train if its at all possible. Traveling by train is like spending the day in the park. Everyone is relaxed, casually walking around meeting and talking to people. Seats are huge and comfortable and there's usually plenty of empty ones around. There's enough cargo space to carry-on a damn motorcycle. You can even get off and go for a 10 minute walk outside, about every hour if you'd like (big deal for smokers). Free parking. Heavy-duty climate controls keeps it more comfortable than your house. Almost no lines or security checks. Good chance of electrical outlets at your seat. No problem bringing a big cooler full of your own food & drinks. Plenty of big bathrooms. Extremely quiet and smooth ride, without the ear-destroying whining of turbines. And none of the sudden acceleration, altitude changes, banking turns, high and low G-forces, etc., you get when flying. In fact much less sense of motion than riding in a car or a bus. Instead of being the worst part of your trip that people just tolerate, it's one of the high-points you'll look forward to.
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